For some time now I wanted to share my thoughts about the parenthood.
Last week I felt very strongly that dad is very welcome to be a stay at home dad! I would like to be able to work, go to the toilet without any stress. Perhaps eat my breakfast little bit longer than 2 minutes. Or eat when I start feeling hungry without a baby crying after you. The thought of going to work and just be you, felt kinda good just then. but that was last week.
I’m slowly getting used to not being able to do so much during the days now. It’s baby Finn that decides the pace for sure.
I don’t know if I can get used to the messy home you get having a baby though, it constantly chasing me: The mess! gosh it’s a pain in the ass.
I’m very grateful having a job that is mainly online otherwise I would of gone crazy. That is my freedom, I can sit at home working whenever finding time.
I really need to keep my mind busy. Soon as Finn is a sleep or dad could take over for a while I try to do a little bit of ‘me’ time. Some days harder than others but it does work out.
Luckily we get enough sleep in the nights cause he only eats around 2am-3am and then again around 5am or 6am. Very happy for the sleep I get.
Becoming a parent is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
In the start everything was easier. Whilst in the hospital you got all the support you need and nurses are like the most amazing people ever.
let me share how it been for us.
This is Jake and Finn strolling out for the first time from the hospital end of december in 2018.
First few days at home were fine, we took it very slow only us three.
So much happiness.
I think by day 3 I started to get really sore nipples.
It got worse day by day and in the end I had blisters and it was bleeding.
P A I N F U L !
Worse than giving birth and I never heard about this before. ( the hard things people don’t really share so much about )
So now you know if it’s new to you as well!
But luckily there is something as magical as nipple covers. They look mega big when first seeing them but they do work. So have these ready just in case, otherwise you end up like me crying like pig soon as feeding.
Finn started to cry a lot during 10pm & 2 am. That was kinda tough not knowing what to do when he didn’t stop crying, bless him.
Daily calls to the midwife to ask what the hell we can do about it.
In the start all sorts of thoughts goes through your mind, fever?
stomach ache? cholic ? What is wrong!
Never thought it was hunger, ( cause I feed like every second hour A LOT as well hmm hungry baby )
Luckily with some formula he fell a sleep straight away, anyway long seven days till that was sorted.
I started to go through the whole birth experience in my head over and over.
I was slowly taking it all in I think. Both happy and a bit taken.
At this time I had the chance to let myself feel exhausted not for long though cause all of a sudden Finn started to get rashes in his face, lips, cheeks, around his eyes for head, it was just growing.
We used fat creams but it didn’t help, we went to see the doctor and she said it’s eczma. This morning it was spread down on his throat to.
We came home with two different creams to use daily, one was containing salt, so rubbing Finn with that was horrible – he was screaming so much I felt like the worse person in the world. Imagine how much that burned on his skin! The eczma continued to spread all over his belly.
Few days later it was all gone. Thank god it disappered.
Week four and five.
Started to feel like we were getting some sort of rutine and nothing stressful happend, puh!
Jakes parent came to visit us. All the love and support we got from them are priceless. Feeling super happy and super sad at the same time when you thinking and wishing for us to be closer each other. With a baby life changes, love and support from your family means a lot.
Week six and seven.
Finn is bit more upset towards the evenings, soothing is the only thing that helps. Carry him close to the chest till sleeping. God forbid if sitting down it’s walking that helps.
Mr Finn do not settle if we’re not moving. Whats was new for this week is that I feed without the covers – so feeding don’t take up to 40 minutes anymore, which makes it all a bit more easy going.
Since becoming a mom all I’ve done is feeding. Eat and drink a lot of water when being a milk machine ladies. Highly important!
Eight weeks today 27th of February. I’m happy we’re here now.
The first few weeks has been hard. fun. heaven & hell. stressful. lovely. tiring. exciting. life changing.amazing. High & lows.
There been days I felt fuck I can’t do this anymore. I’m not a good mom! Will I survive?. What was I thinking when saying I wanna be a mummy and so on, it’s not only cozy days let me tell you that.
And it’s alright saying out loud that being a parent is hard.
Last week when being super exhausted I shared on Instagram about my feelings, and with that I’ve got the most amazing feed back.
Hallelelua mamas – I love you for sharing your emotions with me! I’m not alone. It’s bloody ok to say being a mom is freaking super hard!
Last week I also felt it was more hard than it has been this week.
It really is like a roller coaster ride with one million feelings at once.
We’re very happy and in love with our Finn boy and today has been like the most easy day we ever had so it’s almost like I forgot how hard it was last week.
Wonder if I’m gonna be one of those mom who says in six months time that the baby bubble is the most cozy time ever?! Cause the brain do tend to forget those hard times, ask any mom who has kids over 6 months old. I can almost garentee you she says only the good and lovely things with a tiny baby. HA!
I wanted to share my feelings with you and how it’s been so far, and if I forget myself I can go back and read this one day.
He laugh so much now and talks a lot too. It melts our hearts! Seeing how hard he tries when making sounds and how happy he gets each time it’s the cutest.
Finn boy you are so loved, thank you for giving us so much joy!
( I regret saying I sell you on the market the other day )
That was in my weakest moment I guess 😉 .
It’s a cool journey becoming a parent. Far from easy. The best thing you ever gonna experience for sure. Life will never be the same-only better. Less sleep but you survive.
Things I’ve been thinking about since Finn arrived:
How can you ever wanna drink alcohol ever again? Dealing with a hang over with a kid? OMG.
Might just be me but I get so sick from drinking, and the thought of a bad hang over + a kid to look after. I could never. Perhaps I should treat myself to a 8 years non alcholic drinks.
This update got pretty long, I hope you made it to the end cause I really wanna know about the hang over part.